St Giles Church Garden round 2

I found dianthus 'Passion' at Mitre 10 yesterday, for $2 each so bought 21 of them for St Giles. They have a scented red flower like a small carnation.  I wanted to plant them yesterday but had something else on, so did it after work today, am hoping it rains because when I got there the island bed was covered in weedmat and the council had planted it with hebes, and on the other side whipcord hebes. This despite Graham saying he would like anything but bushy plants that people can throw cigarette butts in, maybe some grasses. Well hebe is your classic bushy cigarette butt hider plant. Plus you have to cut it back, and it develops little bald patches if you don't trim it.

I was also horrified with the weedmat. How am I supposed to plant flowers in weedmat? Cut 21 holes? So I tore it off. Sorry PD/council workers - you mean well, but..I claim that patch in Jesus' name.  Then Kara from Second Nature dropped by as she was picking up her daughter from Kimberley Daycare, I hadn't seen her since I temped for her, she said she had been frantically busy with six designer gardens for Auckland Design Fest (held on the same weekend as APW presentations). She said yes get rid of the weedmat.

I did leave the hebes in there though. Not sure what colour they will be, but generally if they are little and compact they can stay in good shape its only when they grow and get straggly that they become monsters like the mexican orange blossom did, and hide all manner of drug user paraphenalia, coke cans and plastic bags.

Another horror was I got there to find Bob the lawnmower man had ridden straight over the hydrangeas I planted in the lawn so there was nothing there. Oh good one Bob. (I don't know if his real name is Bob,  Pat just said 'it's a little man that does the lawns' - a church member would not have been so cruel, so I just call him Bob. Or it might be Jim). Speaking of hydrangeas, I have come across some residents complaining they don't like big beautiful hydrangeas next to there apartment and they had been there 17 years. Well, if they'd been there 17 years and never lifted a finger to prune them then tough..they are staying! Hydrangeas aren't that hard to prune either. Just cut the flowers for your vase, they are the plant that keeps on giving.

I'm on the side of hydrangeas and have become a fan. But they do need shade and water, which is hard to come by in our food desert church. I forgot the afternoon sun would fry them. I'm not so big a fan of camellias. If only I could remove the camellia someone had planted next to the church, note to self, don't plant big bushy plants next to buildings, especially camellias. Because people either really like them or hate them. I'm still trying to get rid of mine that my brother thoughtfully planted in the wrong place by the front/back door.  Why hydrangeas and not camellias? Well hydrangeas are deciduous and let the light in come winter, and there flowers are big, gorgeous and last forever, whereas camellia is the darker cousin, has evergreen tough leaves and small flowers that don't last, and turn brown and  mushy when they die and fall off, leaving what looks like dirty tissues all over the ground. I'm letting the camellia live though because I'm trying to espalier, aside from the fact she's as tough as old boots.

So anyway now those grassy dianthus are in, I cut them back and now let them flush again, prayed for rain, so that come Sunday we might have some flowers to pick for church. Its not full yet I will be adding more plants as they are sent to me and mulching with compost but at least I have made a start. Next plan of attack is church shady corner weed. If you'd like to be a secret Good Samaritan gardener you are welcome to do this one so the Sunday following I will find it weeded and passers by will marvel what a miracle it was. It wasn't me...all glory to God!

In other secular news our West Auckland Community gardens won a bronze medal in the Garden Olympics I mean NZ Flower and Garden show so congrats team -- can't wait to see it! It's held at the Trust Arena just up the road from me. Was given a free pass unfortunately if you have not got one of these you might have to pay $42 to get in the door.
Well, it's less than paying to see a live rock concert lets put it that way. I'm hoping they might have free giveaway plants or flowers for each visitor, cos that would make it worthwhile. I will wear my new floral dress and put the flowers in my hair.

Hallelujah! Inspired permie graduates

Wow, had my permaculture graduation yesterday in which a dozen of us presented our design projects. All unique and inspiring..would like to share here (and sorry I'm not so good at remembering names, so if I got yours wrong please let me know) but a little of what we're learning and applying includes...

Fermenting cabbages and foraging wild plants to make Wild Kraut and selling it at local Farmer's markets. -Kelli-Jo

Designing and using a composing toilet (which I have dubbed 'the Compooster'). -Elaine

Living with others in a tiny home community and making the best use of suburban space including a driveway to park caravan on and sleepouts, having everyone in this family involved in the design process. -Zoe

Living a sustainable life in work and play including talking to cafe businesses about recycling and composting. - Natalie

Practising the art of frugal hedonism by NOT going to the mall and mindlessly spending and consuming. And then showing others in your household the way to reduce and minimise waste. - Louisa

Creating a vlog and documenting a permaculture journey because you can't afford to live in Auckland. Going back to your roots and having a lot of fun learning from others about DIY Kai. -Kim

Installing a permaculture garden on a rental property...then encouraging the landlord to rent this out to other permaculture novices needing a place to stay in Auckland. - Gloria and Nikolaj

What to do with the family dairy farm? Or nan's angora goat farm? If its outside of Auckland, and if its 25 hectares? Host a whole lot of permies from Auckland on tiny homes and shepherd huts? Turn it into orchards?  It's open to suggestion and exploring various options.  - Bernie and Bridget

Creating a sustainable street and planting up front yards and berms. Holding ladies nights where the permaculture message will spread (and blokes as well). - Monique

Moving on to a organic garden property (again outside of Auckland) that's already been established, and looking for ways to improve on what's already started.  -Gemma

Holding organic garden workshops by koha in community gardens - teaching and passing on skills that we've acquired. -Barbara

Congrats to all permies who presented - we are a busy bunch.

Will keep everyone posted about the church permablitz. I am planning to hold a mini working bee again at some stage to do the shady corner bed of the church and front island and then carry on in stages. I just need to apply for some funding and had lots of volunteers wanting to obtain a yield flowers and joy. I am actually off to church today and will share the (refined) vision with more church members. I am hoping Annette might like some bananas by the church but I don't know where to find them. I was kind of worried that some were saying they were going to use the money to expand the building to incorporate a ten storey carpark. Ok exaggeration but what would you rather have more cars or bananas.

Poor Graeme one of the elders has been unwell lately he was in and out of hospital, I did warn him about the dangers of Roundup. When he said a few months ago he was going to spray the weeds, I was concerned but he was determined. 'Oh will just spray it with Roundup, that will get rid of the weeds, she'll be right. ' I do hope that it was not this toxic activity that landed him there. Nobody should be touching that stuff but people still insist on gardening this way. So permies I may need your help because I don't want anyone to die from thinking they have to poison weeds to make a garden.

I haves designs

This is taking much longer than I anticipated, because nap times are not included. Who knew designing was so exhausting. This may be why there are no beds in design studios.

Also, designers can't go out and garden in their design studios either so they don't have that distraction of plants that need to be planted straight away or they will die. Yesterday at the floral circle got two plants from the trading table - one Mexican Bush sage and another Japanese anemone. So my garden is going international with plants from all over the world.  These plants needed to go in and some other plants needed to come out and these needed to be put somewhere as well so by the time I got back inside ready with the felt tips and butter paper its was 9pm.

And still no photos I don't know how people can garden and photograph at the same time but I am not one of these that takes garden selfies to show off to others. Do you really want to know all my gardening secrets? The thing with design is it's really about layout and putting paths in, and then the plants can be arranged later, but this whole infrastructure and systems thinking I am still getting the hang of, because I'm not in the business of construction. I can make a raised bed out of rosemary cuttings but I need all the materials  to grow beforehand, with designers they seem to have the world of concrete and edging at their disposal and can carve out land with a rotovator. I don't have that luxury. Designers can also have resource consents and map things to building regulations, and the more analytically minded can put a fence here and there but I'm more well this plant wants to go here, and if it doesn't like it it will go here.

Anyway, I have very rough sketches of the ideas and vision for St Giles, as blogged previously, which is roughly some zones...hanging baskets at church entrance and containers, shady subtropical nikau bush monstera corner, espaliered fruit trees on side of church and bus stop waiting area with olives shading more seats and a little free library with Bibles, a rainwater diverter/harvester and solar gain roofing panels (with skylight for church services with natural lighting) and solar night lights for evening. A church picnic bbq area leading to flowered border and pergola archway for weddings, with subtropical plantings of banana, passionfruit, hibiscus, taro, gardenia and canna lily. By the day care centre a vege trail for children. And on the road side entrance an olive/feijoa orchard with pumpkin patch an herbal ley attracting beneficial insects.  Also a grapevine.

Now if the church members start complaining it's too much maintenance and would rather pay Bob the lawnmower each week to make some noise I am seriously thinking of quitting my job to do this church garden. You can either pay someone to make a lawn desert and forget about flowers altogether or you can have something wonderful for free.

How I will pay the bills I don't know, but if nobody makes a start all the cars going past on Te Atatu will pass by and just see another church building like all the other church buildings that have carparks and may decide to worship and get married and have funerals somewhere else that at least has some flowers.

Isn't that right Lord? Banished from Eden, because of plant misidentification. You can eat all the fruit of all the trees in THIS garden, that God has given except for THAT one. So what does man do, eat from  the forbidden one that kills him. It will be interesting to see this season how many forbidden trees are on display that you can't eat from, the shopping malls have already got them up and decorated, hustling for consumers.

Horticultural challenges

It's a busy week, but I need to record my progress as many things are happening.

Yates Vege challenge. Well I finally put some edibles in my own patch, was given runner beans on Sunday (thanks Louise) and I've cleared some space by the back fence for them, adding compost, potting mix and shredded paper mulch, plus a trellis for them to climb. Perhaps not the sunniest spot but hopefully they will grow there as it is warm. I have cleared some space for sunflowers in the raised bed, cutting back the lemon balm. Apparently according to Kiwi Gardener moon calendar, I am not meant to sow any seeds today...but when looking at moon calendar in NZ Gardener its was different so I don't know which one to follow?!
APW had a swap table and managed to snag some cherry tomatoes, so three went in near the silverbeet and I've mulched with lavender clippings. That was all I had. Not sure where I am going to plant sweetcorn as now have no room but will need to create a new bed at some point.

Went to water Woodside this evening as couldn't make it on Friday, watered the potatoes we planted on Thursday, as well as tomatoes, eggplant and capsicums. The fence is now up and it's much easier to water now the tank is moved closer.

I had flowers at church on Sunday, so put in gerberas in pots and bunches of sweet peas. My sweet peas are booming and most of them prefer the neighbours side of the fence. But I have spread them out a bit this year so some are in the vege bed and some are out the front.

Tomorrow have Floral Circle, did some more permaculture design after work today, but I can see why designers go off to office studios to work in because doing it at home is so distracting. You need to bring in washing, prepare dinner, answer emails, water your garden, get changed, check on chickens, lock up garage and a million and one other things that take time.

I also find myself wishing that asphalt and concrete had never been invented because of all this time wasted blowing paths and roads clear of leaf litter that makes perfectly good mulch. I feel like Mr Plow of the leaf clearing brigade armed with blower and making roads and paths sterile and devoid of life. All I'm doing is making it easier for a car to roll on in to a hospital. And I suppose easier to roll on out.  I never had to use a mower, blower or weedeater when I did real gardening. Now I just feel like am a tidier upper who goes to the dump all the time and I am going deaf from all the machinery noise. Whats a bit of leaf and twigs anyway. Don't you want to create healthy soil, not get rid of it?

I have been shouted a free pass to NZ Garden and Flower show hooray. I'm going to help with the pack down/set up of the community garden stall. If you are going, be prepared to be amazed because Flower shows are not the easiest thing to create an entire garden for. You need to install an entire garden have it up for five days and then pack it down again? And keep all the plants alive and happy,  looking perfect - no easy feat.

Karyn tells me she watches a show called 'Allotment Challenge' which from her description sounds like 'Garden Idol' or 'Survivor' or 'The Block' reality game show whereby only the best gardener wins. I don't know what they win, fortune and fame I guess. I'm not sure I would garden for fortune or fame but I suppose many people do these days, create a garden and sell it off. I'm not sure what the point of that would be because isn't labour and what you harvest it's own reward. You couldn't really buy homegrown veges with the money you win, cos that would defeat the whole purpose. Maybe it's just the fame then and the humiliation of being on TV. Is it fun watching other people trying to grow things and failing? You could always just read my blog.

Living locally in the Auckland Bioregion

Was the name of the final permaculture workshop we had yesterday.

I am exhausted and my brain is about to explode. I have all these ideas for my patch. I am reading about Transition Towns and eco-sourcing and permaculture design books and garden style books and wondering just what will happen when we run out of oil. Perhaps we will have electric cars powered by water and Auckland will still be a rat race with millions of rats running round it trying to find their cheese twisties up 20 storey skyscrapers.

My small and slow solution might be if you going to build these really tall buildings at least grow some vines over them. Mulenbeckia likes a blank wall of concrete.

So my vision for the future is this..

We will have bicycles and electric bikes as well as pedal cars just like the Flintstones did. The speed limit will be lowered to 30kph if you want to go any faster you need to take the train or move to Hamilton. Imports, of both people and stuff will be banned for a year. We need to see if we can be self sufficient for a year or so, I'm sure Auckland can survive without any more new second hand Japanese cars or gourmet cat food from Australia.

In that year everyone will start their own backyard, front yard or side yard balcony garden. Every household will have two raised beds planters, a compost heap, a lemon tree and worms. Every household  will also be given a chicken and a lamb, to graze their patch, because lawnmowers will be banned (it will be really hard to get petrol).

Our parks will become owned by the people that live within walking distance so every neighbour will have the opportunity to become stewards of their park and can make it their own garden. Instead of traffic lights we will install garden roundabouts with flowers.

Our Auckland sewerage system, now that its discovered that the overflow from rain water pushes sewage directly into our harbour causing our beaches to become polluted and the fish to die, will be fixed so that, rainwater from roof run off goes into the garden not the wastewater. So everyone will need to install diverter taps from their roof to a tank or watering can, or create a pond where they can stock with fish which will feed their hydroponic lettuce growing system.

All restaurants in the Auckland area will have designated kitchen gardens and suppliers will need to be local. Supplies of grain will not be a problem as we will convert all the disused muddy rugby fields to growing rice and wheat if they don't like to live on potatoes. (I don't mind..I would eat potatoes everyday if I could).  Unfortunately that means some people will have to give up playing rugby but surely thats a small sacrifice, rugby players will need to start training for 'Round the Spaghetti Junction' bicycle race instead.

Since berms are not going to be mown we can now make these into flower gardens to bring beneficial insects, bees and other pollinators into our neighbourhoods and to pollinate our fruit trees. Each neighbourhood will have a special harvesting road side stall with an honesty box so on the way home from work or school everyone can have a snack or food for dinner.

The Warehouse, Mitre 10, Bunnings, Countdown and all retailing shopping malls, since there will no longer be imports for a year will be empty and people that couldn't afford a house in Auckland can live in them, they can become refugee camps for the homeless until the other towns in NZ decide they would like some JAFAs after all and invite them to set up in their town.

Every church will have its own garden with flowers too so that I don't need to go to the Warehouse and buy flowers. Actually I won't need money at all because rates will not be charged for a whole year. With food I grow in the garden and a roof over my head I and everyone in Auckland will be content, and on weekends we can all go fishing and catch fish and dig for pippis and cockles in our unpolluted harbour.

How this all will come about I don't know but anything is possible!

Design flaws and other garden bloopers

It's design project day today, have taken the day off work to get it done. What have I learned so far...well people say you learn from your mistakes but I'm aiming for perfection so I'm just going to learn from other people's mistakes. My garden design is just going to have to be perfectomondo since nobody is paying me to do it, actually, I'm the one paying the Auckland Permaculture Workshop to do it. I expect the bill to come in  any day now.

When I thought about this in the back of my mind wondered if it was really a gyp and will they even recruit me into their design studios when they see how awful my drawing is but hey at least I know my plants.

So...here is a quick tour of the garden designer's walk of shame.

Using jasmine as ground cover. When it grows in spring, you will have to clip it every week, and if you don't it will grow into a tangled mess. Use jasmine up a wall or give it something to climb.

Eugenia or lily pilly. Every lilly pilly I've seen gets eaten by psyillid and you will have to spray and spray. Better to rip it out. If you want a lollipop topiary why not shape some chicken wire into balls and grow ivy over them. 

A gardenia hedge. As well as masses of plants being prone to thrips. Was asked to clip back a gardenia hedge just as it was beginning to flower cos it was getting too big. We refused. Do you want a bunch of twigs as a hedge or do you want to brush past beautiful smelling gardenias? Plant gardenias as they are meant to be planted (with other plants) and leave them be. 

Massed dietes, massed flax,  massed bird of paradise, massed anything. Just no. One plant looks splendid in a pot, two make a pair, three a trio, but an undivided clump that squashes every available space...no.

Cabbage trees in a lawn, yuccas near a path. Flower carpet roses underfoot. Unless you like your lawnmower in a tangle and your feet pricked and skin stung. 

Gardens with no seating areas. How are you supposed to sit and contemplate life if there's nowhere to sit?

A thin, winding uphill grass path that needs to be mown, but you can't get a lawnmower up. Or lawns on a steep slope when it would be perfect for a pumpkin patch.

No nearby drinking fountain. Gardeners get thirsty too you know. It's not really a good look to drink direct from the hose.

A totally shadeless garden. We have a hole in the ozone layer in New Zealand people. Do you want to fry? Plant some trees or create an arbour/pergola.  If I want to see the endless horizon I would go live near the beach.

Conversely, vege gardens in the shade. Veges need at least 6 hours sun for production. Don't plant veges under trees or near thirsty tree roots.

Trees near the house. Their roots will seek out your plumbing and block your drains trying to find water. Unless you build a tree house and live in the tree. Why fight it when it wants you to live in it!

Carpark beds with plants that can't stand foot traffic and car doors.

Bark mulch that is on a slope that will blow over on to the path. Overusing bark mulch as a way to get out of weeding, but ends up as a way to get out of gardening altogether. An empty bed with just bark in it, does not really look like a garden. Pak n' Save I'm referrring to you.

Planting dry loving plants in a wet area, and water loving plants in the dry, and then wondering why all your plants are dead.

A field. A field is not a garden. If you going to have a field put some sheep in it to graze it and manure the soil.

Astroturf. Weeds can still grow on astroturf and they can be harder to pull out.


Trying to do everything at once. Gardens are not all planted in one day. Put some workers to work, and don't forget your animal workers - bees, butterflies, birds, worms, hedgehogs, chickens cats. Well maybe not cats but if cats are not visiting your garden something's wrong. Look at it from their point of view..is it comfortable? Are there interesting areas to sunbathe in and play and hide? Is it safe? Could you walk round naked in it if one day you forgot to put on some clothes?

Ok maybe not the last one but the first garden on earth had all the animals in it as well and the humans were walking round naked and not ashamed, before clothes were invented.

Forbidden trees. We are banned from planting phoenix palms. It's a weed. Please don't plant them and think they look cute and tropical or 'architectural'.  They have lethal barbs and all the pigeons will come and roost in it and poop all over your garden and your neighbours will hate you.

Well that's it for now I must get cracking with my colouring pencils and felts.

Gardener's bootcamp

0700 Hours. Arrive at work, clean boots
0705 Sign in and get keys
0710 Unlock shed and get gear ready
0715 Water outdoor pots 30 minutes
0745 Water indoor pots 1 hour 15 minutes
0900 Organise Garden group, health and safety brief, weed
1000 Morning tea break/smoko
1030 Weed some more
1200 Clip and tidy areas
1300 Lunch
1330 Hoe rose beds
1400 Hoe roundabout and weed
1500 Odd jobs, lock away gear in shed
1530 Sign out, home time!

Then another day from 0900 hours its lawns, lawns lawns until 1400 and then weeding.

Sometimes I get growled at by commander Mr Perfect. "You call that sweeping?". "What are you doing on your hands and knees, use a hoe!" "Jesus woman, can't you start a lawnmower?!"

Reply "Yes boss". "I'm sorry boss" "Yes it looks terrible, I will do it again".

"Get it right the first time. If it's not perfect, you might as well have not done it at all"

"Yes boss".

I go off and quietly cry in the loo.

"What took you so long?"

"I was watering the indoor loos".

"Well I need to know.  Tell me before you do that so I know that's what you are doing. We need to get going. The plants aren't going to clip themselves"

"Yes boss".

"And where are your safety boots? You should be wearing them at all times"

"I didn't want to get their carpet dirty, besides, you haven't bought me any indoor ones".

"What, with all your ten suitcases in the ute? Ow!"

....

My boss gets pelted with roses.